When you face the facts, it really all boils down to this: I don't live in America. I have never been to America. My president is Ram Nath Kovind. I blame Trump entirely for this, and consider this his biggest failure.
Brave Man Tells Girlfriend To ‘Calm Down’
“Looking back, I probably could’ve phrased things differently, but god dammit if the bitch wasn’t acting crazy.” John informed the police officer from his hospital bed, the painkillers finally kicking in.
Seven People I Met While Buying a New Cock Ring
Zack is the first employee I meet in the Amazing Adult Emporium in Providence, Rhode Island, and Zack says no, he’s only there to ring me up, but you can tell that by “ring me up” he means help me put on my new cock ring.
Yelper Not Quite Sure How Many Stars To Give Auschwitz
"That memorial was one of the most eye-opening, profoundly heart-wrenching experiences I have ever had, but it's the burial ground for a million-plus innocent lives. How many stars is that worth?? Fuck me."
Woman Never Roofied Feeling Inadequate And Undesirable
“I’m tired of hearing all of these stories about women getting roofied, Sara. I’m feeling left out. Am I not good enough to be roofied? I know I’m getting older. Hell, I’ll be 26 soon.”
Good Samaritan Breaks Window To Free Dog From Overheating Car
Born on a mountain, raised in a cave, trapped in a car.