Pyongyang, DPRK –

In a historic development, the Trump administration reached an agreement with North Korea’s Kim Jong-Un at their summit in Vietnam today, under which the reclusive Asian country will gradually denuclearize over the next thirty years by incrementally exploding its atomic bombs.

In what President Trump called an “enormous victory for the environment,” not all of North Korea’s explosions will take place on land; some of the bombs will be carried by ICBMs miles out into the Pacific or into the stratosphere.

Speaking after the summit with Donald Trump, Kim Jong-Un praised President Trump’s “tough negotiating style,” and added “Mr. Trump stuck to his guns until we agreed to give up our nuclear testing program and replace it with this. In fact, our negotiations were so successful, we were able to end the summit on Thursday. The world has our assurance that once our denuclearization is over, all of our warheads, along with most other things, will be completely dismantled.”

By Joe Lichtblau