"Does he have to swallow so loudly? Who raised this man? Why did they teach him to swallow like a whale gulping krill off the surface of the ocean? I can't live like this."
After the service, the couple plan to have Matt’s cremated remains carefully mixed into a pot of William’s favorite chili recipe, together with several pounds of burning hot Carolina Reaper peppers, so Matt can savage William’s luscious little butthole one last time.
Shanna leans in toward a customs agent. "El baggage claim?" she asks loudly, slowly enunciating each syllable.
Nicholson went all-in on the solidarity, when he was thrown naked, except for ankle high white socks, into a dimly lit back room with twenty-two men for an entire night.
These e-mails are slated to be sent to her by every political candidate, regardless of political affiliation, until William Thomson, Lord Kelvin's theory based on the second law of thermodynamics proves true under a positive cosmological constant and the endless expansion of the universe results in a collision of energy that annihilates all things.
Donald Glover is an American actor, writer, singer, director, producer, and stand-up comedian. He got his start writing for the show 30 Rock when he was just 23-years-old. Unlike me, who at 23-years-old still didn't have a driver's license or my own bank account.
"I've been learning how to contour from Kylie Jenner, and I think I'm okay at it. But the winged eyeliner is really killing me. One eye always comes out better than the other. And don't get me started on her brows."