Dallas, TX —

No question about it: Virtually all movie critics will have agreed on the fate of Wes Anderson’s about-to-premier movie. They say the four-hour film, “The Past, Present, and Future of the Future Perfect Tense,” will not have captured the interest of even the most devout Anderson fan, minus two or three total nerds.

“It simply will not have had the traditional Anderson character development,” said critic Will H. Held, who claims he will not have had the chance to actually see the movie – even by a year from now. “But by then I will have been proven right.”

Yet even on reading these reviews, the undeterred Anderson most likely will have decided to continue production on his next feature. Starring Bill Murray and Jason Schwartzman as two dysfunctional, eccentric upper-middle class socialites, its working title is “Future Perfect Progressive Tense: Will You Have Been Sleeping Through It?”

By Holly Love