Trudeau To Pose Shirtless Until Brownface Scandal Goes Away

Following yet another scandal, this time over inappropriately donning brownface at a party, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced he will pose shirtless until people forget about it. “People have long since given up on me based on my record alone,” said the Prime Minister. “But I have a feeling if I just stay here in this pose for as long as it takes, flashing my luscious abs to millions of thirsty baes, people will start to remember me as that attractive, promising candidate I once was. I will stand here for days, weeks, even years if it means people will forget everything I’ve ever done and imagine me as progressive again. Also, my nipples are inexplicably brown, and it’s important people see that so they understand the context behind my decision to wear brownface.”