Fisher Price just unveiled to a conference room filled with stockholders, influencers and retail executives what they are touting to be the hottest toy to hit the market next year: the one that other kid is playing with. “We are extremely confident that your child will put down whatever toy was previously holding their attention in favor of our hottest new product: whatever that kid over there is having fun with,” the Fisher Price keynote speaker claimed. “They’ll practically be begging for it.”

“Our extensive research with thousands of toddlers produced remarkable results: 100% of the participants greatly preferred Fisher Price’s new ‘That Other Kid’s Toy’ over the inferior garbage currently in their hands,” the keynote speaker continued.

“If kids aren’t pushing each other to the floor and having meltdowns when they can’t pry the toy from another’s clutches, it’s not Fisher Price.”

By Andrew Froese