As confusion sets in over who should be wearing a mask, and whether or not they actually limit the spread of COVID-19, a recent health report put out by the World Health Organization clarified that you only need one mask, despite your many personalities.

“Even fake-ass slut balls can get by with just one mask. Don’t go posting on social media that a store only let you buy one, but that you needed a second because you know you’re a lying, two-faced bitch,” the report read. “If you want more than one, you’d better figure out how to make it, hoe-bag.”

Note: This situation is unfolding. Please check back with Fox News for the latest, and most accurate reporting.

By Emily Cohen

24 thoughts on “Health Report: Two-Faced Bitches Still Only Need One Mask

  1. Two faced bitches should be duct taped to a SAP tree and see how which one has their back

  2. It is what it is,if you are more then one person you definitely need another mask.

  3. When they sent soldiers to desert storm they gave them the anthrax virus to build there Immune system to fight anthrax

    1. Ummm. No. They gave them a VACCINE against anthrax. Not the same. Educate yourself.

  4. You don’t need a mask you need to build an immune system to fight the covid open every thing up and get back to life

  5. I know it’s a minor thing and kind of petty but just on that line if you said make it ‘yourself’ hoebag it would help the comic timing quite a bit due to clarity.

  6. Best, best article..most like the only fully truthful article out right

  7. *best article I’ve read in a lonngg time ! It had to be said πŸ€·β€β™€οΈπŸ˜«πŸ˜‚πŸ˜Ž

  8. This is the most Outrageous article. If we had a Female Lead Society or a Bonafide Feminist Movement in America such articles would have been banned.

    1. Thank God there isn’t, or else NOTHING would be funny anymore.

    2. It’s a fucking joke….Lol calm down Marge. You don’t want to ruffle that mask 😷 πŸ˜‰πŸ˜˜

    3. LOL!!!! Yeah America needs that like another money-grubbing democrat-socialist!!!! Work for it and you can get it in the USA unless the Dems give our money away….

    4. But that would go against the first Amendment.

      Not that i support the demeanor stand point- but whether I agree or not – they still have the right of speech

  9. I heard on NBT that a quarter of all american two faced bitches will die due to genatalia gangliolia which is a rapid virus know in the “bitch ass hoe” family the CDC’S for controlling this di-ease states it to be true and correct and the constitution is being rewritten banning all nasty puss plug Americans out of our direct sight and country. – thanks by: j castoreno

  10. I believe the underlying issue is that these two-faced bitches do breed. Two masks may just be the way to go. Consider. One mask to cover the mouth and help prevent the spread of infectious diseases. The other for gentalia.

    A second mask over the dirty genitalia of two-faced bitches may help prevent the spread of two-faced bitches. This mask would efectively warn others of the two-faced bitch nature of the two-faced bitch individual. And who willingly gives or receives dick from two-faced bitches? The honest people of America because two-faced bitches don’t have to be up front about it.

  11. Fake ass manipulative toxic negative ass two faced bitches do need two masks 😷 . One fo day face and one ☝🏾 fo day ass🀣.

  12. Thank you for making it clear for some of them fake ass bitches

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