Despite repeated advice from his campaign managers to at least “rub a little booty,” Senator Bernie Sanders declined to heed their wisdom. “It has become clear that by making exactly zero percent of women and young girls uncomfortable around me, that I simply cannot become the Democratic nominee, yet alone the President in this climate,” Sanders told his supporters from a respectful distance. “I apologize for not giving the voters what they wanted, but I promise to continue my work of being an upstanding citizen, a fierce defender of the people, and an absolute ball of righteous indignation.”

By Emily Sanchez

79 thoughts on “Sanders Fails To Sexually Harass Enough Women To Win Race

  1. Like the Scandinavian countries. They’re great! That’s the kind of ” socialism” Bernie wanted. Wow…how very horrible of us to have some basic human rights and needs met.

  2. So this is Journalism these days just making baseless claims about people you don’t like? Enjoy voting for another rapist idk who’s worse trump or biden supporters.

    1. Let me ask you some questions.
      Is an accusation a conviction in a court by a jury?
      The accusation against Biden, are you aware of any evidence beyond one persons statement?
      In our system of law, is a person presumed innocent or guilty? Does that presumption come before arrest or after?
      What about formal charges, does the presumption come before or after?
      If an accusation is all that is required, if someone accused you, would that be sufficient to destroy your character? Your career?
      Should we try people in the media or by public opinion and how is that different from a mob?
      I acquired my HIV by being raped so I know what sexual assault feels like. I’m simply asking that actual justice and reason apply.
      With Trump, we have physical evidence and witnesses that he cheated on his wives, that he’s paid cash settlements to move actual cases with actual charges out of court.
      We should believe accusers when they come forward, it took me over a decade to admit I was raped and years after that before I was public about it. But we should not sacrifice justice along the way either, and that leaves us in a very uncomfortable position as a society. “The Crucible” is cautionary on this note.

      1. Got it…. Don’t trust Eric in a room alone with a women EVER!!!!

      2. Actually… Tara has more evidence than any of Trump or Kavanaugh’s accusers.

        Her time lines are backed up by aids in terms of when she was their manager to when she abruptly and without reason was removed from a managing position (lines up with her claims).

        Her friend and brother both confirm that she told them if allegations right after it happened. This was long before there was any political motive that could be applied to the claim.

        She supposedly filed official complaints but there has been a refusal to release documents.

        The New York Times just admitted that it held the story but gave no credible reason why…. and admitted they made edits to the original posting of the story on behalf of the Biden campaign.

        She has filed a police report which is a crime to do falsely.

        She voted for Obama both times and did not back Bernie in 2016, and Bernie was her second pick this time… so little evidence of it being political there either.

        Then there’s the whole thing with Times Up Now not taking on her case due to Biden’s campaign staff doing PR for Times Up… completely trying to bury the whole thing.

        Then there is the science of lying. Tara checks all the truth boxes. She remembers pointless details that had an emotional connection like “the wall was cold”, but doesn’t remember specific details during action moments like not knowing how or when he put down the gym bag and that it seemed like it all happened in one movement. She remembers the things a trauma victim would remember and doesn’t remember the things a trauma victim would be likely to forget.

        If you believe trumps accusers or Kavinaughs accusers and not Tara, then you are simply choosing to believe women only when it’s convenient and not based on evidence or any sort of moral code.

        I tend to believe them all.

  3. How can people complain about Bernie bros? Literally we’re fighting for so many issues. Environmental policies, health policies, social justice, economic equality. PEOPLE ARE DYING from blood money. Get over yourself.

    1. Because the road to hell is paved with good intentions and that socialist road has been traveled many times and it always leads to the same place.

      1. Glad to see Socialism bailing out Capitalism yet again.

      2. Does it lead to American led coups?

      3. Such a goofy statement “Glad to see Socialism bailing out Capitalism yet again.” If you said the world seems to prefer Capitalism in good times and Socialism in bad times, I could accept that.

      4. Yes, it does. Happiness. Check out the happiness indexes. Communism leads to bad places, and it is different.

      5. The road to hell is paved with good intentions, the road to heaven is paved with good actions. I believe it is not the intention but the lack of action that was intended. Whilst pure socialism might be bad, so is pure capitislm. Perhaps a balance between the two are needed.

      6. Right – save the socialism for the rich – and just call it a stimulus! Everyone is fooled! Yay capitalism!

      7. Yeah, just ask any Swede! They’re all starving! 🙄

      8. It’s necessary to define socialism, communism and capitalism as systems of wealth production and distribution; likewise, democracy and dictatorship (totalitarianism) are systems of governing. When we pair them equally, you can have 1. democratic socialism (Scandinavia, etc.); 2. totalitarian socialism (Cuba); 3. democratic capitalism (USA, much of Europe); 4. totalitarian capitalism (modern China, Nazi Germany*); 5. totalitarian communism (USSR); 6. democratic communism (1st-4th century Christians). As a system of wealth, communism has proven to be a little too primitive for modern nations, and when paired with totalitarian government, it usually fails. Communism thrives mostly in outlier religious bodies, such as Mormons, Mennonites, Amish, etc., or It has better success with small communities, such as tribal people (hence, primitive). Communism seems to be the least successful economic system in the current era, largely due to greed and western individualism. As a survival strategy, communism is the universal fallback position. Pair it with democracy and you have the only path forward. Clearly, the problem is totalitarian government.
        *Although the Nazi’s used “socialist” in the name of their organization, this was a way to identify the party with large numbers of working class people, purely fake manipulation, so the communists in Germany at the time, could be defeated. Fascism/Nazism by definition is the fusion of the government with the upper levels of the marketplace, something that seems to have begun in the USA since the Reagan administration. Finally, what is there to fear in socialism as long as it’s conducted under a democratic government?

    2. Lashing out at people who are fucking with your cognitive dissonance is basic human behavior.

    3. Because for all your fighting, none of you actually get along with anyone else long enough to hold power and effect real change. You’re too busy “holding on to your principles” to realize that bashing the nominee when your guy doesn’t win is petulant and selfish and gives us Trump again. If Bernie would have gotten the nomination, I would have shut up and voted for him. Can you say you will do the same now? Make a choice.

      1. Who would an Anti-war voter vote for? Trump or Biden?

      2. There is no nominee as yet, so the question is premature.

    4. It’s sad to see do much division amongst people who are all being taken advantage of and disrespected by our elected officials in the current Republican Party and some in the Democratic Party. There will always be people who are mean and disrespectful in campaigns. We can see it all thanks to social media. We should remember what is at the heart of the candidate as evidenced by their policies. Actions speak louder than words and the actions taken by Trumpsters are against the average American. And now with a Pandemic upon us, it is clear that the wrecking ball the Republicans have taken to our country since Reagan was in office, doesn’t really suit anyone. And, we now see the importance of all the issues Bernie Sanders spoke to. Biden needs to be persuaded to move farther left in many regards. We all need to speak up to his campaign… truthfully and kindly.

  4. Or maybe the democratic party and independents know he wouldn’t beat trump, and even if he did, his ideas would never pass congress. I like him too! The country isn’t there yet.

    1. I disagree. The Biden voter is an unprincipled, “hoping-to-beat-Trump-at-any-cost” voter. If Bernie has won the nomination, they would have fallen in line for Bernie, no problem. Unfortunately for Biden, being a pedo perv, he will ultimately disenfranchise the Democratic left. Thus, quite simply, you can easily see how sanders would have beaten Trump.

      1. Here’s your problem. Bernie is not and never will be the nominee. Full stop.

        Biden voters already showed their principles, and they favor change through governance, not petulance. Can Bernie Bros get their act together? Or will they fall back on their privilege because they didn’t get EXACTLY what they wanted?

      2. sanders has some good ideas but Medicare for all isn’t one congress wouldn’t pass it, may be for people 55 and older might make it. But making you give up your private insurance that i like.

    2. look at where we’re at now. The country IS there, they just don’t even realize it.

      1. Yes. Someone has to take that step. To succeed, though, it has to be timed right, and success is the goal, not to make a point. Losing to Trump isn’t a moral victory, it’s a step back. The timing right now is such that a third of the government is diametrically opposed to any of Bernies ideas, which makes it near impossible to implement them. The government is split, which makes it impossible to make meaningful changes to the country. Call it the blessing and the curse of the checks-and-balances system. His ideas are progressive and will have their time, just not this year. Patience. It will come, but it has to come at the right time. This is not it.

        In the meantime, getting that unqualified JO out of office is a nice second prize.

  5. As a supporter of Hillary Clinton in both 2008, and 2016, I have brushed off more insults from nasty Bernie supporters than I can begin to list. One of my favorites was some anonymous Bro who called me a Corporate Cunt. And it goes on. Believe me I have receipts from women and men, boys and girls who were sexually harassed by leadership in the Sanders Campaign. Receipts. Start believing women. Just make an effort.

    1. LOL! Start believing the 8 or so women who have complained about Biden!

      I think you just engaged in “look over there!” –i.e., because some anonymous someone was “mean” to you, you think that makes Bernie is a sexual harasser? You think that makes Biden innocent? Logic…?

      The internet is a rough and tumble place. Don’t go there if you bruise easily.

      1. teyuna notice how the person replying to you deliberately said, “sexually harassed by LEADERSHIP in the Sanders Campaign” as opposed to “sexually harassed by Sanders”. They’re trying to make a bad-faith false equivalency to basically make a failed attempt at Whataboutism.

    2. what about tara? what about bills victims that said hillary tried to intimidate them into staying silent? those women dont count? If a sanders supporter called you a cunt, that sucks, but it wasnt bernie calling you that, so I dont see what you are getting at. A joe supporter called me a commie cunt for supporting sanders, but Im not pretending joe himself did that or trying to hold him responsible for anything besides what he personally did or supported. As far as receipts, put up your receipts if you have them.

      1. Not women, people. Men are just as capable of making false accusations for any number of reasons, including political ones.

    3. Do you believe the Joe Biden survivor or do you only believe women who agree with your politics?

    4. oh please, what a load of crap. I’m a woman. Hypocrites like you NEVER EVER condemn the vicious, sexist abuse given to Susan Sarandon & Nina Turner & Briahna Joy.

    5. I’ve worked on the sanders campaign and as a female I experienced no such treatment. Although men of all political leanings can be predators and rapists.

    6. Probably your Bernie Bros harassers were the posers hired by David Brock to be “lunatic fringe” vile and violent trolls. He paid them in 2016 and it’s been reported that they were hired back this time.

    7. “While that quote may sound just like something a Hillary supporter may have said about Sanders supporters in 2016, that was actually something said in an email from a Clinton supporter back in 2008 about Obama supports. The quote was included in article from Salon in 2008 entitled, “Hey Obama Boys, Back off Already!” Yet it’s amazing how if you just replace ‘Obama’ with ‘Sanders’ you would think it was from just last year and not 11 years ago.”

    8. “Start believing women.”


      Nikki Haley? Sarah Huckahack Sanders? Chump’s new “press secretary’?

  6. Sadly, it is the comments and “satire “ like this one, that explain why so many refused to support Bernie. His supporters are so offensive and so reminiscent of trump and his supporters…Just two offensive ends of the political spectrum.
    Bernie needed to inspire a better class of supporters.

    1. Ugh, you’re right. I’m just so offended too by the people that won’t just ignore Biden’s innocent sexual harassment and sexual assault. We shouldn’t believe ALL the women, cmon!

      1. We shouldn’t believe a gender, we should believe evidence. And we should do so without political bias.

    2. His core group of supporters are amazing humanitarians who find this humor fitting in light of a very heavy heart today…. thanks for your input though Karen, I mean Linda….

    3. I just want to know, are you at least a little more offended that Joe Biden is a creep and a rapist, than you are that people criticize him for being a creep and a rapist? I really want to know.

    4. Keep spouting off what Corporate media wants you to believe. Sadly many people in America fail to read between the lines since cooperate media continues to blur them and you continue to believe it.

    5. As someone who doesn’t do Twitter, thank God, I have not seen any of these offensive Bernie Bros in action. However many do exist, it’s a shame that those opposed to Bernie’s politics choose to see them as representative of the vast majority of Sanders supporters, many of whom are the activists and organizers working to help those in need.

      Oh, and the majority of Bernie supporters were women. How come that always gets lost in these conversations?

      1. They’re also people of color and working class in greater proportion than other candidates, contra the derogatory rhetoric about “privilege.”

    6. Butthurt because people said mean things about you so you vote for a creepy sex offender? Maybe you deserve the harsh criticism. If you’re so weak mentally and politically that you’re swayed by some rude comments, then maybe you shouldn’t bother voting or voicing an opinion. There are rude people in every single part of the political spectrum. You’re just singling one out because you want an excuse, but you’re too dumb to come up with a proper one.

    7. How is calling out sexual assault offensive? I find it offensive to silence this. Much like trump supporters when he was facing allegations.

  7. There is a deep truth hiding beneath this satire: that truth is that sexuality is a factor in presidential preference, and beta apes instinctually respect and hitch their wagon to rapey alpha males. And Bernie’s not one. In fact, he’s safe. Plus, he’s not sexy. We are also unconsciously respectful of sexy, often more than of policy. Sigh. We have l lot quick evolving to do here peeps.

    1. Lol another idiot who thinks alphas and betas are a thing here…

      1. Yeah, it’s not like humans are related to the rest of the animal kingdom.

    2. I like your comment, Tim, except for the part about Bernie not being sexy (integrity is sexy). … With the implication that Biden is. Yuck.

    3. Then how do you explain King of the Beta Males, the man that the New York Times literally called a “wimp” winning the Presidency in ’88? And what’s this about Joe Biden being “sexy?” He’s a 78 year old rapidly sundowning alzhiemers patient, he can’t speak and he looks like he’s on the verge of death!

      And in my honest opinion, Trump is a little bit light in the loafer’s himself, with this effeminate body language and hand gestures, crazy looking spray-tan, obsessing over his hair (I believe he said it took an hour every day- either that or 30 minutes, I can’t remember). Basically, obsession with vanity. These are VERY feminine traits. He also constantly compliments Men’s body’s, which I find odd, and he was the leader of a Beauty Pageant!

      What I’m saying is that President Trump strikes me as a bit of a Queen. I talked to some gay guys I know (a Trump supporter, and one who doesn’t care about politics) and they told me they picked up the same thing on their “gay-dar.” How more people don’t see this is insane to me. He’s LOVES talking gossip! I don’t have a problem with gays, but I think he should come out after he leaves office, whenever that is. But it’s his decision, of course..

      On the other hand, Bernie Sanders has the most backbone of probably any of the DNC candidates, not to mention all of the yelling he did at the other candidates during the debates and at his rally’s.this year. Certainly more than Chuck Schumer or McConnell or whoever else is in Congress right now. I don’t get why you find Sen. Sanders “beta” or weak; he’s just old.

      Watch this short 2 minute C-SPAN video from ’92, for example of a leader:

      1. If your hypothesis is true, he’s probably highly repressed. Reportedly he could never please his father. Perhaps that’s why he’s so obsessed with “winning.”

  8. This one’s for you Stu! </==

    1. Whoa there, buddy. That MAGA stench is coming off a bit strong.

      1. Stu’s on the sexual predator’s list can’t walk within 100 yds of a school. Hits him personally.