Washington, D.C. —

In a 53-47 split today, the Senate voted to confirm President Trump’s as-yet-unnamed Supreme Court nominee, who will replace the recently-departed Ruth Bader Ginsburg. “We’ve changed the rules so that as long as the person is conservative, which we already know they will be, they don’t need a hearing, or even a known identity,” said majority leader Mitch McConnell. “We didn’t have time to wait for Mr. Trump to make a choice.” If the President does not name the already-confirmed nominee this weekend, there will be an induction ceremony on Monday to appoint him or her to the court using a cardboard cutout.

By Holly Love