“I know you are probably dreading the return to school where all your friends and teachers will excitedly discuss their favorite presents and little trips their families took over Christmas break, but this year you will not come empty-handed to the conversation. I’m gifting you information,” the letter opened. “Did you know that raising the minimum wage is just another step towards living under a communist dictatorship? If everyone had a nice Christmas, then that’s the same thing as no one having a nice Christmas. Toys are only fun if not a lot of other kids have them. It’s called scarcity. Do you see? A universal health care system would mean that everyone would be able to see a doctor and get life-saving medical treatment, and then it wouldn’t be special anymore. Wealthy families shouldn’t have to suffer knowing that your family is having fun this morning. Be good next year, Santa.”

Each letter was accompanied by a cryptocurrency tutorial pamphlet and a coupon for one free Bloomin’ Onion.