"That memorial was one of the most eye-opening, profoundly heart-wrenching experiences I have ever had, but it's the burial ground for a million-plus innocent lives. How many stars is that worth?? Fuck me."
Born on a mountain, raised in a cave, trapped in a car.
"I was using my alt account to send my usual dick pics to random hotties on Instagram - you know, the ones that show some skin and essentially are asking for aggressive sexual reciprocity from appreciative guys like me - but with the photo glitch, all I could send was disappointing attachments that no one woman wants to look at."
Victoria, BC — Bob and Marge Holstein, owners of West Coast Fudgery, have just celebrated their shop's fortieth year of selling uncredited "world famous fudge." Bob proudly talks about his homemade sugar candy and its unverified claim to international fame: "We're a household name. People all over the world know who we are." When questioned … Continue reading ‘World Famous Fudge’ Makers Celebrate 40 Years Of Uncredited Claim
Pinsetters manually set up knocked-down bowling pins. This was back when the game wasn’t the soulless monster it is today. Fuck you, Brunswick.
There are certain parts of life that are unavoidable. Everyone is born; everyone pays taxes; everyone you know and love, will also, at some point, diet.