Shanna leans in toward a customs agent. "El baggage claim?" she asks loudly, slowly enunciating each syllable.
New Parents Wistfully Reminisce About Days White Stains On Sheets Weren’t Spit-Up
"Isn't he the most adorable thing you've ever seen?" Amber asked as she gazed lovingly at the burrito-wrapped crotch Nazi.
Primate Stolen from Zoo: Police Release Sketch of Suspected Simian Snatcher
Sources close to the zoo admitted that, for the past ten years, Kali has frequently been spotted using her limited ability with sign language to signal, “Get me the fuck out of here.”
Inept Coworker Brings In Dozen Old- Fashioned Donuts
"I mean, one or two old-fashioneds, sure, but an entire fucking box? What kind of idiot can't comprehend maintaining a proper plain-to-frosted ratio is imperative?"
Mom Treats Self To $400 Lego Carrier
"This thing has so much room inside I could easily fit an entire Lego City Police Mobile Command Center and still have room for a few Duplos for the baby."