Nashville, TN —

Unsubscribed reporters have obtained exclusive information that indicates a serious loophole will be employed tonight by President Trump in his debate with presidential candidate Joe Biden. The Trump campaign agreed to the debate commission’s new rule that each candidate’s microphone will be muted while the other one is speaking, but it believes this only applies to the microphones already on the podium at the beginning of the debate. Accordingly, the president will be bringing to the debate stage the biggest, loudest, most fantastic microphone you’ve ever seen, so he can interrupt Biden many times, at any time, and all the time. Stand by, Proud Boys.

by Holly Love, Image By: Andrew Froese