"We kids want tender tendrils of tagliatelle. Sweet strands of spaghetti. Voluminous vats of vermicelli. Not slimy strings of squash. Ca-PEESH?"
What makes the 20% so fucking special, and what the fuck do they know that they aren't telling the other 80%?
"You people are despicable. Even if there was a fire, which there clearly is not, this is all just another attempt by the lamestream media to bring down President Trump. If Obama started a fire, you'd all be squealing with glee as you roasted your marshmallows on it. But Trump attempts to bribe a few … Continue reading Rudy Giuliani Denies ‘Lamestream’ Media’s Report Of Dumpster Fire Directly Behind Him
"We are extremely confident that your child will put down whatever toy was previously holding their attention in favor of our hottest new product: whatever that kid over there is having fun with," The Fisher Price keynote speaker claimed.
Headline By Andrew Froese
“I love my goldfish, but I still feel a detachment because of my abject, earth-shattering, stratospheric hatred for the President. That ought to take the sting out of mourning the little fellow!”
"And I guess the apples and honey are fine too."
"No wuckas, then back to moine for a kick-on in the arvo."
“Ohio has long been known as one of many ‘flyover states.’ It was just a matter of time before here in Cleveland we became home to the first ‘flyover airport.’”
"I’m looking forward to a relaxing vacation with my family. My job is done here. Nothing bad can happen to me now. My identity is protected. The worst for me is over.”